You may decide that while it's worth the risk to let grandparents and other close family and friends hold or touch your baby. Verywell Family's content is for informational and educational purposes only. If your baby starts to cry, ask to have him or her back as she needs you. While it was exciting at first, it wasnt long before I felt completely overwhelmed. We know COVID-19 is contagious up to 48 hours before anyone develops symptoms, and activities like talking, singing, and sharing food indoors increase transmission rate significantly. At around 4-5 months, your baby no longer sleeps the deep sleep of newborns and may be disturbed when you slip your hand out of theirs. The contents of You Are Mom is for educational and informational purposes only. You can find out more about our use, change your default settings, and withdraw your consent at any time with effect for the future by visiting Cookies Settings, which can also be found in the footer of the site. "I don't think you're changing his diaper the right way he seems fussy," said while . I love her so much and I would do anything in the world for her. Let us know anonymously here! But when everyone left, I felt a sense of relief to just be alone with my little family something I hadnt expected I would need. Above all else, be patient with new parents. for the content of external websites. For example, a young woman meets a man from a higher social class. Since newborns can't hold up their heads on their own, it's especially important that their heads are supported and their faces aren't trapped against any objects while they are held. And we're not letting any of the kids hold him. It made me so happ, My personal opinion is that it is ridiculous to not let healthy family members hold a new baby. When you visit the site, Dotdash Meredith and its partners may store or retrieve information on your browser, mostly in the form of cookies. SheKnows is a part of Penske Media Corporation. m. moonlitGalaxy. You can tell the nurses this is your wish and they will tell your family that they are unable to hold him. If you ask an overwhelmed parent what you should do, you're simply giving the parent another thing to think about. Smokers should not hold the baby for at least half an hour after smoking. Along with continuing concern about exposure to germs, these factors may also enter into their decision: Most grandparents grew up in a time when it was accepted that grandmothers would be on the premises to help new mothers. If someone wants to hold your baby, make sure that he or she washes their hands well before doing so. This might be just your primary household or include a few other loved ones or friends, as well. Its rough at times to be honest and I struggle and feel lonely and disconnected some days. Add in a pandemic and people who may want to visit. Nemours Foundation. Some expectant parents say that they aren't taking hospital visitors. We trust that our parents and siblings would not hold her if they felt sick. The mother may desire privacy as she tries to establish breastfeeding. Start by selecting which of these best describes you! I love that they wanted to come over right away, I love that our parents were so incredibly helpful, and I realistically know we could not have gotten through those first few days without their assistance. Additionally, there is the worry that germs that produce colds, flu, COVID-19 or other illnesses or diseases could be spread to your fragile new baby. Email Am I being a bad parent by not letting other people hold my new baby?. Grandparents who respect new parents' decisions are likely to see their access to grandchildren expanded, while those who do not may find that access continues to be limited. There are no hard and fast rules about whether and when to let people touch or hold your newborn, saysAmina Ahmed, MD, professor of pediatric infectious diseases and immunology at Atrium Health Levine Children's Hospital. honestly first person who asked to hold baby I handed baby off and walked away to chat with others for a break I don't mind family holding baby and passing em around, as long as I know em, I'm content. Have a parenting question youd like some other mums and dads to weigh in on? 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved, 6 Factors of Grandparent-Grandchild Closeness, Conflicts That Can Lead to Grandparent Estrangement, The 39 Best Gifts for Grandparents of 2023, Expert Tips on How Fathers Can Build a Custody Case, The Ups and Downs of Being a Young Grandparent, 12 Moms Share: What I Wish I Knew About the Postpartum Period. And if strangers attempt to touch your baby? Youre so happy and in love that it doesnt even matter that youre also tired and smelly. Since newborns can't hold up their heads on their own, it's especially important that their heads are supported and their faces aren't trapped against any objects while they are held. Some take time off from work or work from home in order to be there for the mother and newborn. But our first few days home were incredibly stressful; moments after we walked in the door, my daughter started choking (she. Signs that babies are hungry include: moving their heads from side to side; opening their mouths Your baby will not develop head control until about 4 months old, so until then it will be your job to ensure that his or her head doesn't flop from side to side or front to back. Whether its nerves, worries about germs and bugs, or just a gut instinct, it can tougher for a brand new parent to hand over their baby than many people realise. EDD January 24, 2013 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved, Verywell Family uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Welcome to the world my miracle, we prayed and prayed for you, and we can't believe you're here! PH: (01) 6489130, Lo-Call 1890 208 080 or email: info@presscouncil.ie. Verywell Family's content is for informational and educational purposes only. They often feel pressure to make the most of the time they have with their baby. Please Respect That I Do Not Want Visitors After My Baby's Delivery. Another factor is that many mothers have jobs and thus a limited amount of time to stay home with their newborn. it is flu season & such little babies have to be hospitalized for a fever. A wet or soiled diaper can cause tears. Users are reminded that they are fully responsible for their own Feed your newborn on cue. Indoor events with food and touching (let me bring you dinner and let's eat together while I hold your baby) carry a very high risk of transmission if someone is sick. Their baby their rules. 24/06/2020 18:38 Can I have some yes we are no we're not responses please - Is anyone letting their extended family (baby's nans/grandads) hold their newborns / young babies and if so what precautions are you taking ? Respond to crying. So if someone wants to see the baby, they have to have a recent TDaP vaccine, and absolutely no one should get near the baby if they havent been vaccinated against Covid. Dr. Alexander adds: Very serious infections such as sepsis or meningitis are possible during the first few months of life. Just stayed silent. Try rocking or holding your newborn against you, skin on skin. At a minimum, let the new parents make decisions about the length and timing of your visit. Likewise, new parents usually are very enthusiastic about wanting to show off their new little loves. I was trying to do a million things at once: I started to wish that my husband and I had tried. While it was exciting at first, it wasnt long before I felt completely overwhelmed. Good nourishment and hydration are important after birth. Try stroking your newborn gently when you change a nappy or at bath time. Ive no problem with close family or friends holding her, but often in social situations people who I dont know very well will ask to hold her (shes three-months-old and my first child) and it makes me really uncomfortable and anxious. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. When parents ban grandparents from visiting, usually it is to allow the new family to bond without any complicating factors. Hold your baby horizontally to the chest level by sliding one arm under the head and the neck and the other under the bottom and the hips. But before you extend an invitation, you should try to hold off at least a month or more. Being 3 months old, your baby will very soon become more active and easier to play with. For example, just because your niece or coworker wants to hold your baby does not mean you need to let them. That just comes with parenting and extends beyond the newborn stage. Now is the perfect time to start your Baby Registry! Little things like uploading a profile picture make the community a better place. Visits from friends and family started to become exciting; they gave me a chance to socialize and see other adults. The information on this website is of a general nature and available for educational purposes only and Decide on a small circle of people that you feel comfortable touching or being near your newborn, suggests Dr. Ahmed. TTC since June 2009 It can be both tempting and scary to let people touch your newborn baby. She likes to write research-based articles that are informative and relevant. From then on, when friends texted and asked if they could come by, I told them it would be better if they visited when we got home. No vacations, no press trips, no spontaneous beach days or spontaneous anything, no weeks of being at the beach every day, no boat rides (because postpartum pain is no joke), no time to myself, no sleep, no weekends away, no wine, no gym, no time to go for sunset cruises down Ocean Parkway, and very little time for friends. When Can You Let Visitors Hold Your Newborn Baby? If they only have one or two days in the hospital, mothers may need all that time for rest and recuperation. The idea of being heard without having to speak appeals to her. Ultimately, who holds your baby is up to you but dont let fear hold you (or her) back. Don't let people kiss your newborn infant. Those super small onesies. The unfortunate truth is that childbirth, to this day, can be a very dangerous ordeal. They want to see the baby and that's what they intend to do. Will the COVID-19 Vaccine Be Safe for Babies? Weve never been so exhausted or so happy! You might not always be able to tell why your newborn is crying. They are creating a protected period for forming a family unit. I'm tired. 483623. Originally Published: Jan. 16, 2018. aluxum / Getty. No one has ever made me happier. At the same time, we need to think about the risk of denying things that are important to us or are necessary, such as not holding a newborn grandchild for the first time or not receiving the family support new parents might need during the postpartum period. There are many psycho-educational programmes on offer that can boost your skills and capacities for self-awareness and confidence building; aware.ie and grow.ie are two. And of course, part of family bonding when a new baby is born is all about the cuddles; holding, touching and interacting with the baby in a normal and happy way. Flu season is predictable in that it comes every single year at roughly the same time. Everyone we know understands. Here are 6 common conflicts and solutions, including how you can say "no", how you can avoid alienating your in-laws and how you can be sure to stand up for yourself. Hip Hold. Dr. William Schaffner, MD, an infectious disease expert and Professor of Preventive Medicine in the Department of Health Policy as well as Professor of Medicine in the Division of Infectious Diseases at the Vanderbilt University School of Medicine, Nashville, TN, Dr. Leah Alexander, MD, FAAP, a pediatrician, Dr. Harvey Karp, MD, a pediatrician, and author of the best-selling parent guides Happiest Baby on the Block & Happiest Toddler on the Block, Expert Advice For Managing A 12 Month Sleep Regression, The 4 Month Sleep Regression: Survival Tips From Baby Sleep Experts, The 18-Month Sleep Regression: Expert Advice To Get You Through, The 8-10 Month Sleep Regression: Expert Advice To Get You Through It, What Parents Are Talking About Delivered Straight To Your Inbox, By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. 6. Feb 26, 2023 at 7:47 PM. 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